Kish's Recipe for a St. Patty's Day Disaster...often attempted, never duplicated!!! by Kirsten Noel Neat on Wednesday, March 17, 2010 at 12:15pm · 1. Start out with a green shamrock pancake breakfast and set of 18 month old twins. 2. Add 2 packages of rainbow fruitsnacks as bribery while you take a shower. 3. Put on your only green shirt and the two cutest green outfits you can find on your twins. 4. Take about 15 minutes fixing the twins' hair. 5. Pack up the kids to run your errands...then spend about 10 minutes looking for your keys. 6. Drive to quick trip for a soda. At this point, the twins will realize that they are thirsty and want some of your soda. You will give them a sip and quickly realize what a dumb thing you are doing. Promptly drive home to get them their own sippy cups. 7. Run said errands. At this point, one of your sippy cups will drip all over the place and the other will be downed in about 2 minutes. 8. This is the key step: Just as you pull into your driveway, you will hear a gag and cough. Turning around at this point, you will spot the twin who downed all of that cold water barfing green pancake and rainbow fruit snacks all over the car. They will both be crying. 9. Get the wet twin out of the car and set her in the laundry room while you retrieve the barfy twin out of the car. While you are removing the barfed on clothes, the other twin will, of course, dump the dog food into the dog water. 10. Gently place the dirty twin in the bathtub. You will notice the wet twin has a gross dish rag at this point but ignore her. 11. Take a few minutes to take your eddie bauer carseat (yes the one with all of the fancy headrests and shoulder pads etc) out of the van, then go into the laundry room to take it apart and wash it. 12. Go back into the bathroom, at this point, you will realize the wet twin has taken the dirty dishrag and sopped the floor. You will also realize that the dirty twin has taken the toilet brush into the bath with her and of course, at this point, you really have to pee. 13. You will walk quickly into the bathroom, grab the toilet brush, start to take down your pants while trying not to have an "accident" yourself because you are laughing so hard. Then you will slip on the water mid stride, with your pants down, and catch your balance on the sink. Of course, after this whole ordeal, expect to be out of toilet paper. 14. Get the twins out of the bathroom, wash both of their clothes, feed them lunch, and put them down for a nap. 15. As you write this all down, you think you can smell a little bit of barf still and realize its likely on your shirt. But you don't change, because, after all, it's St. Patty's day, and this is the only green shirt you have.